When I first started looking at the Wellness Wheel, emotional wellness was the spoke I wanted to skip. Not because I didn’t think it mattered, but because I wasn’t entirely sure what to do with it. I’ve spent a lot of my life either pushing feelings down or letting them run the show, and neither approach has ever worked particularly well.
Over time, and with a lot of therapy, I’ve learned that emotional wellness is not about controlling your emotions. It’s about understanding them. It’s about accepting the reality of them. Our emotions are part of us. If we’re going to accept ourselves, we have to accept what we’re feeling as well.
It’s about noticing what you feel, why you feel it, and what you need in that moment — without spiraling, shutting down, or judging yourself for being human.
And let me tell you, that is a skill.
The truth is, emotions don’t disappear just because we ignore them.
They leak out in other ways — irritability, exhaustion, overeating, overspending, snapping at people we care about, or feeling like everything is too much when nothing specific has gone wrong.
For me, emotional wellness started with one extremely simple goal:
“Establish this chart and reflect on it at the end of the month.”
That was it.
Not “heal my inner child.”
Not “be more positive.”
Not “master emotional regulation.”
Just… make the chart and look at it later.
And honestly? That was enough. It gave me a place to start. It gave me a moment of intentionality. It gave me a way to check in with myself without pressure or performance.
What emotional wellness looks like for me now
It’s not dramatic. It’s not glamorous. It’s not something I post on Instagram.
It’s small moments, like:
• noticing when I’m overwhelmed instead of pushing through
• taking a breath before reacting
• letting myself cry without apologizing
• recognizing when I need quiet
• recognizing when I need connection
• giving myself permission to have a bad day
And yes, sometimes it’s something as simple as a scent that grounds me. Hair mist has become a tiny emotional anchor — a sensory cue that helps me settle when my mind is buzzing. When I was seeing my oncologist, I kept a very soft piece of fabric in my purse and ran my fingers over it to keep myself steady. It’s not therapy, but it’s a tool. And tools matter.
If you want to try this too
Your first emotional wellness goal doesn’t need to be deep or profound.
It can be as simple as mine was:
• “Set up the chart.”
• “Check in once at the end of the month.”
Or, if you want something slightly more active:
• “Name my feelings once a day.”
• “Take three deep breaths before responding when I’m upset.”
• “Reach out to one supportive person each week.”
• “Give myself permission to rest when I’m overwhelmed.”
Small is enough.
Small is sustainable.
Small is how emotional wellness actually grows.
In the next post, I’ll be talking about Physical Wellness — not in the “run a marathon” sense (we all know that’s never happening), but in the “listen to your body and treat it like it matters” sense.
Because it does.
And so do you.
No comments:
Post a Comment